Ch. 16
That we do not strive to use our opinions about good and evil.
WHERE is the good? In the will.325 Where is the evil?
In the will. Where is neither of them? In those things
which are independent of the will. Well then? Does
any one among us think of these lessons out of the schools?
Does any one meditate (strive) by himself to give an
answer to things326 as in the case of questions? Is it
day?Yes.Is it night?No.Well, is the number of
stars even?327 I cannot say.When money is shown
(offered) to you, have you studied to make the proper
answer, that money is not a good thing? Have you practised yourself in these answers, or only against sophisms?
Why do you wonder then if in the cases which you have
studied, in those you have improved; but in those which you
have not studied, in those you remain the same? When the
rhetorician knows that he has written well, that he has
committed to memory what he has written, and brings an
agreeable voice, why is he still anxious? Because he is
not satisfied with having studied. What then does he
want? To be praised by the audience? For the purpose
then of being able to practise declamation he has been
disciplined; but with respect to praise and blame he has
not been disciplined. For when did he hear from any one
what praise is, what blame is, what the nature of each is,
what kind of praise should be sought, or what kind of
blame should be shunned? And when did he practise this
discipline which follows these words (things)?328 Why
then do you still wonder, if in the matters which a man
has learned, there he surpasses others, and in those in
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which he has not been disciplined, there he is the same
with the many. So the lute player knows how to play,
sings well, and has a fine dress, and yet he trembles when
he enters on the stage; for these matters he understands,
but he does not know what a crowd is, nor the shouts of a
crowd, nor what ridicule is. Neither does he know what
anxiety is, whether it is our work or the work of another,
whether it is possible to stop it or not. For this reason if
he has been praised, he leaves the theatre puffed up, but if
he has been ridiculed, the swollen bladder has been punctured and subsides.
This is the case also with ourselves. What do we
admire? Externals. About what things are we busy?
Externals. And have we any doubt then why we fear or
why we are anxious? What then happens when we think
the things, which are coming on us, to be evils? It is not
in our power not to be afraid, it is not in our power not to
be anxious. Then we say, Lord God, how shall I not be
anxious? Fool, have you not hands, did not God make
them for you? Sit down now and pray that your nose may
not run.329 Wipe yourself rather and do not blame him. Well
then, has he given to you nothing in the present case?
Has he not given to you endurance? has he not given to
you magnanimity? has he not given to you manliness?
When you have such hands, do you still look for one who
shall wipe your nose? But we neither study these things
nor care for them. Give me a man who cares how he
shall do any thing, not for the obtaining of a thing, but
who cares about his own energy. What man, when he is
walking about, cares for his own energy? who, when he
is deliberating, cares about his own deliberation, and not
about obtaining that about which he deliberates? And
if he succeeds, he is elated and says, How well we have
deliberated; did I not tell you, brother, that it is impossible, when we have thought about any thing, that it
should not turn out thus? But if the thing should turn
out otherwise, the wretched man is humbled; he knows
not even what to say about what has taken place. Who
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among us for the sake of this matter has consulted a
seer? Who among us as to his actions has not slept in in-
difference?330 Who? Give (name) tome one that I may see
the man whom I have long been looking for, who is truly
noble and ingenuous, whether young or old; name him.331
Why then are we still surprised, if we are well practised in thinking about matters (any given subject), but
in our acts are low, without decency, worthless, cowardly,
impatient of labour, altogether bad? For we do not care
about these things nor do we study them. But if we had
feared not death or banishment, but fear itself,332 we should
have studied not to fall into those things which appear to
us evils. Now in the school we are irritable and wordy;
and if any little question arises about any of these things,
we are able to examine them fully. But drag us to practice, and you will find us miserably shipwrecked. Let
some disturbing appearance come on us, and you will
know what we have been studying and in what we have
been exercising ourselves. Consequently through want of
discipline we are always adding something to the appearance and representing things to be greater than what they
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are. For instance as to myself, when I am on a voyage
and look down on the deep sea, or look round on it and
see no land, I am out of my mind and imagine that I must
drink up all this water if I am wrecked, and it does not
occur to me that three pints are enough. What then
disturbs me? The sea? No, but my opinion. Again,
when an earthquake shall happen, I imagine that the city
is going to fall on me; but is not one little stone enough
to knock my brains out?
What then are the things which are heavy on us and
disturb us? What else than opinions? What else then
opinions lies heavy upon him who goes away and leaves
his companions and friends and places and habits of life?
Now little children, for instance, when they cry on the
nurse leaving them for a short time, forget their sorrow if
they receive a small cake. Do you choose then that we
should compare you to little children?No, by Zeus, for
I do not wish to be pacified by a small cake, but by right
opinions.And what are these? Such as a man ought to
study all day, and not to be affected by any thing that is
not his own, neither by companion nor place nor gym-
nasia, and not even by his own body, but to remember the
law and to have it before his eyes. And what is the
divine law? To keep a man's own, not to claim that
which belongs to others, but to use what is given, and
when it is not given, not to desire it; and when a thing
is taken away, to give it up readily and immediately, and
to be thankful for the time that a man has had the use of
it, if you would not cry for your nurse and mamma. For
what matter does it make by what thing a man is subdued, and on what he depends? In what respect are you
better than he who cries for a girl, if you grieve for a
little gymnasium, and little porticoes and young men and
such places of amusement? Another comes and laments
that he shall no longer drink the water of Dirce. Is the
Marcian water worse than that of Dirce? But I was used
to the water of Dirce.333 And you in turn will be used to
the other. Then if you become attached to this also, cry
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for this too, and try to make a verse like the verse of
Euripides,
The hot baths of Nero and the Marcian water.
See how tragedy is made when common things happen
to silly men.
When then shall I see Athens again and the Acropolis?
Wretch, are you not content with what you see daily?
have you any thing better or greater to see than the sun,
the moon, the stars, the whole earth, the sea? But if
indeed you comprehend him who administers the Whole,
and carry him about in yourself, do you still desire small
stones, and a beautiful rock?334 When then you are going
to leave the sun itself and the moon, what will you do?
will you sit and weep like children? Well, what have
you been doing in the school? what did you hear, what
did you learn? why did you write yourself a philosopher,
when you might have written the truth; as, I made
certain introductions,335 and I read Chrysippus, but I did
not even approach the door of a philosopher. For how
should I336 possess any thing of the kind which Socrates
possessed, who died as he did, who lived as he did, or any
thing such as Diogenes possessed? Do you think that
any one of such men wept or grieved, because he was not
going to see a certain man, or a certain woman, nor to be
in Athens or in Corinth, but, if it should so happen, in
Susa or in Ecbatana? For if a man can quit the banquet
when he chooses, and no longer amuse himself, does he
still stay and complain, and does he not stay, as at any
amusement, only so long as he is pleased? Such a man, I
suppose, would endure perpetual exile or to be condemned
to death. Will you not be weaned now, like children, and
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take more solid food, and not cry after mammas and
nurses, which are the lamentations of old women?But if
I go away, I shall cause them sorrow.You cause them
sorrow? By no means; but that will cause them sorrow
which also causes you sorrow, opinion. What have you
to do then? Take away your own opinion, and if these
women are wise, they will take away their own: if they
do not, they will lament through their own fault.
My man, as the proverb says, make a desperate effort on
behalf of tranquillity of mind, freedom and magnanimity.
Lift up your head at last as released from slavery. Dare
to look up to God and say, Deal with me for the future as
thou wilt; I am of the same mind as thou art; I am
thine:337 I refuse nothing that pleases thee: lead me where
thou wilt: clothe me in any dress thou choosest: is it
thy will that I should hold the office of a magistrate, that
I should be in the condition of a private man, stay here
or be an exile, be poor, be rich? I will make thy defence
to men in behalf of all these conditions:338 I will shew
the nature of each thing what it is.You will not do so;
but sit in an ox's belly339 and wait for your mamma till she
shall feed you. Who would Hercules have been, if he
had sat at home? He would have been Eurystheus and
not Hercules. Well, and in his travels through the world
how many intimates and how many friends had he? But
nothing more dear to him than God. For this reason it
was believed that he was the son of God, and he was. In
obedience to God then he went about purging away injustice and lawlessness. But you are not Hercules and
you are not able to purge away the wickedness of others;
nor yet are you Theseus, able to purge away the evil
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things of Attica Clear away your own. From yourself,
from your thoughts cast away instead of Procrustes and
Sciron,340 sadness, fear, desire, envy, malevolence, avarice,
effeminacy, intemperance. But it is not possible to eject
these things otherwise than by looking to God only, by
fixing your affections on him only, by being consecrated
to his commands. But if you choose any thing else, you
will with sighs and groans be compelled to follow341 what
is stronger than yourself, always seeking tranquillity and
never able to find it; for you seek tranquillity there
where it is not, and you neglect to seek it where it is.